Tuesday, 28 July 2015

Twelve Reasons I'm The Last Person You Should Ask For Blogging Advice

I'm always flattered when I'm asked for my advice around starting a blog/reaching more people/my 'top social media tips' but the more messages I receive the more I realise just how unprofessional I am at this thing we call blogging.

Here are twelve reasons I'm underqualified to show anybody the blogging ropes:

1) I don't know what Bloglovin is.
Serious question, do I need this in my life?

2) Facebook is the lifeblood of my blog.
Though I have always felt like Twitter is the spiritual home of parent bloggers, my Facebook page is much busier. Sometimes I feel like I am on Facebook island, with the real parent bloggers hanging out in the other blue room with the birdy wallpaper.

3) I blog sporadically.
Sometimes twice in one week, sometimes just once a month. Occasionally I see other bloggers tweet, 'I'm behind on posting this week, sorry guys' and I think, 'fuck, I haven't posted for 5 weeks'. Is there an unsaid obligation of post regularity? Am I failing at that too?

4) I'm not on Pinterest.
I don't really have any interests outside of wine and Tom Hardy.

5) I have a blogspot website address.
I recently read something which said the most important thing about being taken seriously as a blogger is having your own www.nameofblog.com website address. I missed that memo early on and I'm not going to change it now.

6) My blog design is shite.

Equally important is the professional design of your blog page - the first impression created when people 'land' on your page. Usually there is a fancy header and customised social media buttons. Well bollocks and arse. My 'design' is a bloody shambles because I did it myself so it looks like a Year 9 IT project. I genuinely need to do something about that...*puts the kettle on instead.*
I know, I know. 'Tis a bit crap.
7) I don't do reviews.
In fact, I think I might be a bit PR unfriendly because I find it all a bit awkward so I just say no to everything. Thank you, but no thank you. And then later think shit, I should have taken the free stuff. Just to be clear I sometimes do mention stuff I've been given, I also mention stuff I've paid out for - but I don't review anything, it's just stuff I would have bought or used regardless.

8) I'm not making any money from my blog.

When somebody asked me, "how do you monetise your blog?" I was like, "Sorry what?" No idea what you're talking about, unless you mean from adverts which I decided against. I've also had messages asking me how many followers I had to attract before I could 'make a living' from my blog. Again, WTF? I make the same money from my 150k social media followers as I made from 50 followers i.e. the square root of fuck all.

9) I don't know what the Tots100 chart is.
I logged on once to find I'd 'dropped' down the rankings but have no idea what this means. I've now forgotten my password and I got distracted checking eBay the last time I thought about resetting it. I'll probably never check it again.

10) I've never hosted a 'linky' or come up with a weekly hashtag .
I'm looking at parent blogging legends like you BrummyMummyof2 with your #WickedWednesdays and you Al (The Dad Network) for your overall ease with all things Proper Parent Blogger. Hats off to you all, I'll just eat some crisps over here.

11) I've never scheduled a tweet.
Nor would I know how to do this. I tweet when I'm on hand to respond, is that not a good idea? I probably clog up the feeds of my followers with mass tweets in two hour stints when I'm chain-drinking wine tea on the sofa. I don't understand why I need to spread my tweets out? Again, this is a serious question. Answers on a postcard.

12) I've never been to a blogging event/do of any kind.
In fact the MAD blog awards do in September will be my first ever outing in my capacity as a 'blogger'. I've only ever met one other parent blogger. I am rubbish.

Basically, I don't really feel like a proper blogger. But in my own slightly unprofessional and rookie way I'm having a great time. Maybe there aren't any hard and fast rules, just guidelines that it probably makes sense to follow because they are mostly very sensible.

So to all the new bloggers who have messaged or emailed me to ask for tips I would say this: just do what you fancy.*

[*and maybe ask the slightly more proficient bloggers for genuine help, because jokes aside the blogging community is a bloody lovely one and if you rely on me for help you're drawing the short straw. Not a clue.] 

The Unmumsy Mum

40 comments:

  1. Love this post. I do know what bloglovin is, in fact thats how I follow your blog, but linkys baffle me as does scheduling tweets, I understand scheduling tweets (but not how to), but I think its the opposite of the whole point of twitter so I don't.

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    1. Thanks Charlie! I'm so confused about bloglovin, am I on there?! Did I put myself on there? Haha! Thanks for reading too x

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  2. Ha ha I love this. I started blogging recently and have fallen headfirst into all of the places you mentioned above. It's refreshing to hear it can all work out even if I don't schedule my tweets and keep on top of bloglovin'.

    I love how social the blogging community is and its great seeing how my blog is growing into something real rather than a snore fest!

    Love your blog, always get your updates. My husband is an avid fan too, so you win the dad crowd awards too!

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  3. Haha I love this. I have fallen headfirst into the blogging world with tots100 and domains etc. it's refreshing to hear that it can all work even if I don't schedule my tweets! It's so social as well, I never expected to be part of a community.

    Always love your blog and keep up to date with all your posts. My husband loves it too so you win in the dad subscriber category too!

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  4. I have no idea how I managed to post this twice. Apologies!

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  5. I only recently discovered your blog and I LOVE it! I don't feel like a "blogger" either, I just like sharing stuff but I sometimes question what I'm doing when I compare myself to the big wigs of blogging. Think I'll stick with you on the fun boat although I sometimes accept the freebies hehe x

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  6. This is so great to read! I find it really easy to feel that I'm not blogging "properly" because I haven't scheduled my blog posts in advance and that I haven't tweeted for a day. Thank you!

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  7. Great post! It makes me feel a bit better about my blog not being as good as I think it should be and Wondering why I have less views this month than last month. I still feel s bit rubbish though- I'm going to eat some crisps and try to channel you.....

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  8. Ha ha! I love this, thanks for making me feel less like I'm failing at blogging! Started my blog a few months ago for a bit of fun, then came across all those terms: bloglovin, linkys #pbloggers. #WTF??! Almost gave up because of my general clueless state. But didn't. Kind of loving the whole 'muddling through' bit.

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  9. Ha ha! I love this, thanks for making me feel less like I'm failing at blogging! Started my blog a few months ago for a bit of fun, then came across all those terms: bloglovin, linkys, #pbloggers. #WTF?! Felt pretty intimidated by it all but persevered and, actually, my general clulessness is kind of adding to the fun as I muddle my way through x

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  10. Thanks for the big up bab! Can't beat a nice linky. I shall squeeze you at the MADs. In between drinking and trying to get off with a CBeebies presenter xxxxx

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  11. Brilliant and re: point 6) try year 5 :(

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  12. Omg thank you so much for this!!!!!! I needed to read this. I'm the exact same I also do my own thing and not stick to the general rules of blogging. I have read so many posts on what I'm meant to be doing as a blogger and I feel like a failure and beat myself up. It makes me not want to blog anymore because I don't like to be restricted and told this is how to do things!!! Once again you've made my day thank you unmumsy mum ๐Ÿ˜Š

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  13. Love this - I get myself so stressed out with trying to do the right thing and love that the reason your blog is so bloody successful (say what you like - it is) is because your so damn good at telling the gut-wrenching, sometimes disturbing, but always hugely funny truth. But I do love me a good linky

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  14. Lol at your Year 9 IT project comment! I think blogging is just what you make it. Everyone starts for different reasons and there really are no rules. Pretty much like parenting really. PS. I think I saw you at the BFLF thing in Exeter but was so busy with a hot grumpy baby I didn't get a chance to say "hi". I'll be at The MADs in September though so maybe see you there - I'll be the one at the bar drinking all the wine.

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    1. Tee hee thanks Molly! Yes I was there, we had to leave when our baby got cross and hot too. Would love to have a chat at the MADs really looking forward to it, I'm also likely to be propping up the bar :-) Take care xx

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  15. I LOVE your honesty in this blog post! Nice to read! Keep doing what your doing! X

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  16. I think you are doing blogging how it should be done - and ace-ing it! x

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  17. I've very recently discovered you and I LOVE your posts/blog.. sorry no offence intended. I'm new to this lark too, and you have inspired me. Unfortunately, I have nothing fun to talk about, apart from a mum with Dementia and a life sapping job.. so that could be a tad depressing? Please keep doing your thang and don't compare yourself to the rest. We love you as you are. x

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  18. And I'm so rubbish, I can't even sign my own entries. What a Pleb!

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  19. I'm just a mum, and I read your blogs via links I see on facebook...I haven't a clue about blogging either. Not something I do. I have to say that, actually I like the fact you aren't really sure too. I also like that you aren't bothered about "monetizing" it (although maybe financially it might be good?) . I think by not being a pro blogger, you probably retain a sense of reality in your peices, such that they feel approachable...like friends sharing thoughts and funny tales over coffee (WINE!) . As I said, I know nothing about blogs/blogging so I could be talking so much cr*p it could compare to a teething baby's nappy ��. Either way, keep up the good work x

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  20. Nice read. I too am a blogger. Managed to setup FB that automatically updates Twitter & similarly blog very sporadically. Not sure who reads or if anyone ever tries the recipes but maybe I'll try and print it one days for the little sprogs to read through and cringe at!! Keep up the good work & thx for inspiring me to continue (despite my blog also looking very amateur!!) ๐Ÿ˜‰

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  21. So glad I have found you! X

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  22. Haha, I like all you've said, & just keep doing what you're doing. x

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  23. All of the above are what makes your blog so bloody refreshing! I am not a blogger any more. I don't think rankings even existed when I was. But I follow a lot of bloggers on Twitter and OMG the fretting over stuff, who's got time for all that guff??

    (I also don't really get the point of linkies and the fact that the apocalypse will apparently occur if someone on another continent dares use YOUR hashtag has been a source of great amusement to me.)

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  24. I love this post. I've been blogging for nearly a year and I'm constantly worrying about the points you've mentiobed . I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't get things

    www.thelifeandlovesoflolly.co.uk

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  25. Haha, brilliant, there's hope for me yet:) I'm new to this, and totally baffled!

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  26. Very, very funny. Here's to sporadic blogging, broken links and not really understanding SEO. In other words, writing something you like, hoping someone reads it. Look forward to meeting you one day at one of the blogging conferences. Assuming we both turn up that is ;0)

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  27. After leaving a cup of tea to get cold while I made myself feel a bit cack by reading polished yummy mummy posts, this is possibly the best blog post I've read. Ever. Mrs C :-)

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  28. I can't log into Bloglovin without thinking of McLovin on Super Bad. Actually. I can't log into Bloglovin at all because I have forgot my password. Super.

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  29. I love this. I am new to blogging & LOVE your posts so have just started to follow you on here as well as on Facebook. Its good to know I wont be the only one winging it - even if I'm not quite a professional winger like yourself.

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  30. Your posts are comedy gold! Providing so many laughs during my early stages of motherhood, so honest and true I think most of us can relate to your situations. Thank you for often brightening up a shit day!

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  31. Arghhh hahahahahahahaha sorry I am still laughing about the tampon post on your facebook page big hairy bum arghghghghghg *pulls self together*
    You are right! About all those things! yet you are totally nailing it, and it is clear that you love it and not caught up in all the guff. Nice one! New follower here x

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  32. This is the best. When people are just naturally epic at blogging without all the bullshit.

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  33. So until Mau this year I was exactly like this (having launched Nov 2013). Then I 'got off my arse' so to speak and started doing a lot of that bloody blogger stuff we're meant to do (except I still don't get Bloglovin, Klout, Tots100 and a load of others and am horrible HORRIBLE at pinterest). I can't lie, doing the Twitter thing etc has done wonders for my blog's profile but honestly? I may or may never make money out of it. I'm a tad exhausted with the sheer amount of social media time required. I just wanna write dammit! Loved this post. Popped across after noticing the MadBlog awards mention from CarryOnKaty on Twitter!

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  34. I think those are all the reasons people come here!

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  35. I'm glad it's not just me! no amount of googling is helping me understand these things! I'm just going to keep on writing.

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  36. Glad to hear all this. I started blogging-ish earlier this year and am always slightly horrified every time I see someone has read it, before concluding with some relief that it was probably me refreshing my page! Keep doing what you are doing. X

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